Remind yourself that hanging out with his friends is a great way to win them over. If they support your relationship, it could help your chances in the long run.
Try saying something like, “Chris is such a good guy. I’m enjoying getting to know him, and I’m really glad to be meeting his friends!” Or you might say something like, “Jay makes me laugh all the time. I bet you guys always have a good time hanging out. " Part of being loyal means definitely not flirting with his friends, so avoid giving too much attention to any one person who’s not your boyfriend. [2] X Research source
For instance, don’t expect your boyfriend to cuddle on the couch with you while his friends are watching a football game. Instead, pick a team to root for so you’re part of what’s going on! If the guys are talking about something you don’t understand, like an inside joke or a story with some history you weren’t a part of, keep a low profile. Smile, laugh, and listen, but don’t worry if they don’t break down every detail for you. [4] X Research source If you start to feel left out, wait and talk to your boyfriend about it after the two of you leave. That way he’ll be able help include you in the conversation more next time.
You don’t have to smile all the time, especially if it feels unnatural for you. Just try to keep your face relaxed and pleasant. When you’re talking to someone, lean toward them slightly and make eye contact to show you’re interested.
For instance, if everyone’s talking about basketball and you don’t know anything about it, don’t pretend to be a huge fan. Instead, say something like, “I’ve never watched much basketball but it’s been fun to learn a little about it!” On the other hand, if do watch basketball, feel free to jump in the conversation and share your opinions. If it normally takes you longer to open up, don’t feel like you have to force yourself to be outgoing. Just be friendly and let things unfold in their own time.
Yep, that means waiting until you get home to text your BFF about how much you think they should date your boyfriend’s cute roommate. If you do need to answer a call, text, or email, excuse yourself to another room for a moment.
If you’re struggling to appreciate someone, don’t try to tell your boyfriend to stop talking to them. [9] X Research source Instead, ask your boyfriend about them in a subtle way, like: “So, tell me more about Josh. How did you guys become friends?” That said, you don’t have to put up with being mistreated. If someone is rude or says something really offensive, it’s okay to say something like, “I’m really not okay with that. “[10] X Research source
If you and your boyfriend normally tease each other a little, it’s okay to do that in front of his friends as long as you keep it playful. Just don’t go overboard or tease him about anything he’s sensitive about—or anything he’d be embarrassed for his friends to hear about, like the way he kisses.
The same goes for cutesy pet names—when your boyfriend’s friends are around, it’s best to stick to his name or something generic like “Babe. " Talk to your boyfriend about what you and he are both comfortable with. If he’s super open to PDA but you think it would be awkward around his friends, it’s okay to rein him in a little!
In fact, if someone else brings up a sensitive topic, it’s sometimes better to answer like you didn’t know by saying something like, “Oh really?”
Any small talk will do—ask questions about things like what they do for work, what kind of music they’re into, or what TV they’re watching right now, for instance. Try to find something you have in common so you’ll have something to chat about the next time you hang out![15] X Research source
Plan a cookout or a night out and ask your boyfriend to call his friends and invite them. You could also throw a holiday party with a fun theme, like Ugly Christmas Sweaters or Silly Halloween Costumes. Or, host a game night with plenty of snacks and sodas.
Arrange a hangout with your own friends, order takeout and have a spa night, or go see a movie, for instance. If your boyfriend feels free to maintain his own friendships and independence, he’s going to feel a lot more confident in his relationship with you.
